I'm not proana, this is just a safe place for me. (side blog). 5'7 || SW: 212 || CW: 148 || GW1: 170🔒 || GW2: 150 🔒|| GW3: 130 ||GW4: 120 || UGW: 112 - 115
Until my boyfriend actually worries about me instead of encourages me,
Until my friends and family notice just how much weight I’ve really lost,
Until none of my clothes fit and I’m forced to buy a whole new wardrobe,
Until my stomach is flat, my waist tiny, my fingers dainty,
Until I’m someone’s thinspo or body goals,
Until they say “You’re so skinny!” instead of “You’re not fat”,
Until they ask, “What’s your secret?”
Until they ask, “Do you even eat?”
Until I’m dead.
✨😭Personal Motivation😭✨
To see my hips
To see my shoulders to be able to see past my stomach
So see what my stomach and back look like without a mile of fat stuck on.
To not wear holes in all my pants
To bend into certain positions without my rolls getting in the way
To be more confident
To have more self esteem
So when I fall I don’t get hurt as badly
So I don’t take up so much room on the bed
So I move faster
So my thighs don’t slap together when I walk fast or run
I can make friends, and they won’t just see me as my fat
I can walk anywhere without everyone’s eyes shooting directly to my biggest parts (thighs/stomach) instead of my face
So I can start to improve on other things in life without the fat holding me back
Better job opportunities/ opportunities in general
So people don’t get scared when I move close to them
Baggy clothes even tho its a medium
the stares of others
“have you eaten”
rib cages that pop out when I bend my back
sharp collarbones “that could hold water”
being able to fit 3 fingers in between my thighs
hip bones that stab others when I hug them
a concave stomach when I lay down
“wow you have lost weight”
tiny dainty fingers
fitting my hand around my wrist
easier shopping
size 0
size XS
feeling confident in a two piece swimsuit
crop tops
“smallest sit in the middle” referring to you
hitting your ultimate goal weight
25-inch waist
saying your weight confidently
being able to wrap your hands around your thighs
sharp jawline
cheekbones that others would die for
no underarm fat
FEELING PRETTY
A thigh gap
“You got hot”
Being the skinniest of your friends
-To raise my self-esteem and confidence.
-To always be the skinniest girl in the room.
-To shrink my stomach.
- Because not eating hurts less than eating does. (unknown medical issue)
-To always fit into the smallest size, or be too small for it.
-So that I can feel good about myself in any clothing.
-So that I can wake up, grab anything out of my closet, put it on, and not have to go through 20 different outfits before I find one I feel okay in.
-To never worry that a store wont have my size.
-To make my family confused when they see me and I’m magically tiny compared to everyone else.
-To comfortably fit in middle car seat.
-To not sweat/overheat as much in the summer.
-To not always feel the need to wear baggy clothes.
-To look great in all clothes, tight or baggy.
-To be envied by everyone, rather than envy everyone.
-To be super light for piggy back rides or when I’m carried.
-To prove everyone who ever called me ‘fat’, ‘chubby’, or anything else, wrong.
-To see my bones.
-To make my old friends jealous, and wonder how the hell I did it.
-To walk through my old high school and not be recognized.
-To be told to eat more instead of being told to go on a diet.
-To be real-life thinspo/bonespo.
-To be perfect.
-To be considered underweight instead of overweight or “healthy” weight.
-To have a thin waist, a thigh gap, cheek bones, and collarbones that pop out whenever.
-So that my stomach is flat/concave even when I sit.
-So my weight is double digits
-So that people worry about me being too skinny, not too fat.
-So that my mom can’t make comments about me eating too much, or eating the wrong thing.
-So that I can go places and not be self conscious.
-To always look good, even when I’m sick, having a lazy day, tired, or anything else.
-To finally wear what I want and look good. (ex. crop tops, skirts, leggings, skinny jeans, ripped jeans, heels, bikinis, sweaters)
-To not look bad in my clothes, or have spots that bulge.
-So I don’t have to constantly suck in.
-So I can take “fat” off the list of my negative traits.
-To not cancel/decline plans just because of food or how I’ll look.
-To actually be skinnier than the people around me.
You want them to be able to put their hands around your waist when you cant even fit your hand around your wrist.
You want to go days without eating when you can hardly do 24 hours.
You want hipbones and you can barely see your ribs.
You want a thigh gap but you cant see past your stomach.
You want to be thin and dainty.
But you have no patience.
Things take time.
But youre so impatient that you think after a week that nothing is going to change.
So you binge.
Then you start up again.
And you stop and binge.
You have a recurring habit when you dont see results fast enough and you need to stop.
Stick to your plan for a day
Stick to your plan every day until those days become a week.
And then two weeks.
Then a month.
Then you start getting the results you want.
First, you could fit your thumb and middle finger around your wrist, three months in and now its your thumb and your pinky. With space in between.
First, twenty four whole hours of starving was torture,
Three months in and the pains are your drug.
First, you had a stomach you felt embarrassed in.
Three months in and all ribs are visible and your hipbones stand out through your jeans.
First, you wore holes in your jeans with the rubbing of your thighs, the dark marks on your skin from the rashes when you wore skirts were a constant reminder of your struggle.
Three months in and your legs are elegant, they no longer rub together and you feel free.
- Stop eating around 8pm- give your body plenty of time to digest the food;
- Drink 1-2 glasses of water before meals- This will fill up part of your stomach, making you feel full faster;
- Eat slowly- make sure you chew your food well and eat in a slow pace. This will give your brain enough time for it to know you’re full!
- Eat in a adequate environment- Sit at a table, maintain a nice posture and focus on the food in front of you;
- Don’t eat between meals- Have two snacks (mid-morning, mid-afternoon), breakfast, lunch and dinner. Keep your mouth closed during the rest of the day! This will prevent over eating;
- Make lunch your biggest meal- Eat enough for breakfast, have small snacks and eat little and light for dinner. All of this helps your body process food better;
- Sip that tea- If you can’t handle not having anything in your mouth, pack a bottle of green tea (a little bit of honey will give it a sweet taste) and drink it trough out the day. It is known for boosting your metabolism!
No more stomach, back, or side rolls
Thighs won’t touch
People will comment on how gorgeous you are now you’re skinny
You can get any boy or girl you want
Your thighs won’t drastically expand when you sit down
Dainty little arms and wrists
Your face will look amazing from every single angle
Your body will look so nice naked
Cute little butt
Astounding self-control
Stunning bones poking through your unblemished skin
Clear and glowing skin and face
People can wrap their arms around you easily when you hug
Thin, long fingers wrapped around a steaming mug of coffee or tea
Me can lift you up with ease
No extra weight when exercising
Collar bones like a model
Every out fit looks beautiful on your little body
Always find your size
XS jumpers look baggy on your thin frame
Tiny waist
You’ll be the skinny pretty friend, not the obnoxious fat one
It’s so worth it x
~ not feeling sweaty, sticky and unbearably hot during summer due to all the fat surrounding your body
~ buying that bikini instead of feeling sorry for yourself for letting your body go all those summers in a row
~ the heads you’ll turn in your crop top and denim shorts instead of bulging out of them like you used to
~ the confidence you’ll feel when you can wear anything you want without the fear that everyone is looking at you
~ letting your boyfriend actually touch your stomach without the fear of him being repulsed by your fat
now do you want to eat that?
I’ve seen loads of posts like “you may not have reached your goal by summer, but imagine how skinny you’ll be in fall/winter”.
I know lots of blogs who have a current weight of 200lbs or 180lbs and people with higher BMIs. Guys please do not damage your body trying to reach your goal weights in this tiny amount of time. It will not happen over night. Be patient and be kind to your body.
